Hi all! Quickly check out the bat charm Roger gove me for Christmas. Isn't it the coolest?So get this...Christmas was NICE! It's not been great these past
few years. I mean, I'm happy with my life...I have a wonderful
partner who loves me even though I'm severely damaged as an individual mentally as well as physically. I have a son who is
turning out to be somewhat of a musical savant at 14, which I can live with. I have two step-children: Miranda (15) who is so much like her father...Doctor Who fan, loves math (ew), is just as cynical as her father and I are, loves Marvel comics (she got that from me. I've been in love with Marvel since 1985), doesn't give two shits what her peers think about her (another trait she got from me. I was the goth kid in school and a pioneer of gothiness I was. I had the black hair, which is naturally red...the white make-up - I used cornstarch as face powder, black lipstick and layers of Wet N Wild eyeliner...only because it was .99 per pencil). I listened to bands no one had ever heard of back then: The Birthday Party (who are now Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds or Grinderman, depending on who is playing the actual instruments), The New York Dolls (Billy Idol started out with them), Patti Smith (if you've never heard the song "Because The Night", you are missing a major chunk of musical greatness. 10,000 Maniacs covered it around 1993 and Natalie Merchant nailed it. I listened to Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground, The Dickies etc. I was 14 and my goal in life was to go to CBGB's and see Iggy and the Stooges perform. Incidentally, the song, "The Passenger" is STILL my favorite song to this day. It's been covered by everyone, but give it a listen. It's so perfect and wonderful. I heard it the other day on a goddamned Lincoln Continental Commercial. I'd like to think Iggy didn't sell out, he bought in.
So this year I put up a tree - something I haven't done for the past three years due to depression. Roger said it was good that I put one up...that I've been more "me" lately. A few months ago I switched anti-depressants and those take a few months to kick in, so maybe these will work. I went from Prozac (which worked miracles for me in 1992 but did squat this time) to Wellbutrin. And a plus? I'm smoking a lot less, so hopefully win/win.
My son, Alex, is coming to live with me at the end of the school year. I'm so excited! He's not thrilled he has to leave the ranch in Oklahoma, but his father relapsed and is going into a 6 month rehab program. This is his third time and for my son's hope, he stays sober. I know why he does drugs. His mother was the first person he ever got high with. He was 11 at the time. He never HAD a mother...she was always fucked up. She died when Alex was 2 (he's almost 15) of a drug overdose. So my ex, no matter the female, he always treats them like shit after he's been in the relationship for a while. He's expecting the woman he's with to give him what his mother didn't. And it doesn't work that way. Thing is, everyone is aware of this...he just is the only one that doesnt' see it. And until he realizes it, and talks it out with a professional, he'll never be well.
Eh, enough about that. My arthritis is wonky and my hands are killing me. God love auto-immune...it's the gift that keeps on giving.
Until next time!
